Random Acts of Kindness

I've been sick this week.  It's given me time to reflect as I lay in bed about a time in my life when I was sick for about 16 weeks in 2003.  I get sick for the first 16 weeks of pregnancy.  It's not fun.  I throw up so much I end up dehydrated and on an IV and lose about 20 pounds in that 16 week time.  The first baby was the hardest because I didn't know if I'd be like that the whole pregnancy and I'd already lost 3 babies to miscarriages.  We were scared, I felt horrible and never thought I'd feel normal again.  The second baby was hard since Matt was at school all day, I had the first baby to deal with, and a horrible doctor who didn't think anything was wrong with me until he realized I'd lost 20 pounds and was feeling better at 16 weeks.  The third baby was tough because I had 2 babies to deal with, Matt was in school part time and working full time.  I made it through with good friends popping in to help when we lived in the new community of Shetland Meadows in Tooele.

I wasn't sure I wanted to go through another pregnancy after that and wondered if I'd have a fourth.  At this point I started having major dental problems from all the throwing up and calcium and vitamin loss the babies took from my teeth and bones.  I wanted to stay healthy for the 3 boys I had committed to raise.  After a lot of prayer, when Jaron (the third baby) was about 3 we decided to have one more...maybe we'd get a girl!

This pregnancy was hard because, not only did I have 3 boys to handle, but an in-home daycare and we needed the money to pay the bills.  Quitting wasn't an option for me.  We decided I couldn't go back and forth to the ER to get hydrated with an IV every time I dehydrated so we opted to have Home Health come in to care for me.  I was put on an IV drip for several weeks.  That time was a blur for me.  I'm not sure how I got through it.  I must have had to get rides for the daycare kids to school since I was hooked up to an IV pole all day for a couple weeks.  After that I just hooked myself up to it at night to receive the hydration I needed.  My daycare families were understanding and didn't really have another place to take their kids so we muddled through.  Smelling food always caused me to throw up.  I had the hardest time preparing meals of any kind for the kids, but I did it because I had to.  I could usually hold down an ice cold chocolate Ensure in the mornings and tried to eat any carbs I could during the day.  The most important thing was to keep hydrated.

During this time my husband had a home teaching companion named David Bates.  He was a single 30 something guy and very active in the church.  He and Matt became good friends and had 100% home teaching every month.  I'm sure Matt told him about things at home.  I couldn't cook, so Matt did his best to feed himself and the kids.  The kitchen is not his favorite place so he just did what he could.  They probably ate a lot of frozen dinners and card board boxed items.  I'm not sure, because I'd always go to our bedroom in the basement so I wouldn't smell the food cooking.  I always felt more sick at night.

One late afternoon I answered the door to find David standing there with two bags from KFC and a big smile on his face.  He said he'd heard I was really sick and couldn't cook dinner so he wanted to help.  I was so touched by his concern and thanked him profusely.  I'm sure I looked haggard, pale, and thin, but my heart was so grateful.  The food smelled delicious.  For the first time in weeks I felt like I wanted to eat.  I opened the bucket of chicken and chose a piece.  I had some coleslaw, potatoes and gravy, and a biscuit.  It was the best meal I'd tasted in my life!  The kids and Matt ate well that night.  There were leftovers for lunch for me the next day and I enjoyed another wonderful meal.  I'm sure David had no idea how much I appreciated his kind gesture and would probably be surprised to find that 9 years later I still remember his kindness.  I think it is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me.

I hope this illustration will remind you that if you've ever had a thought to do something kind, even if it wasn't much, you should do it.  It may change someones day or even affect them for the rest of their lives.